Outing a queer person without their consent especially in a country like Nigeria is one of the worst things you could do to a queer person. To the four people we spoke to in this story, they know too well that it is like to feel the fear of being outed before you feel ready and how it leaves you exposed to violence.
My sister outed me. She caught me watching lesbian porn one day. Before I could say ‘Flash’ she had run to my mother. My mother on her part wasted no time descending on me. It was brutal. My family have spoken about it now and moved past the homophobia but that day, God I wanted to die.
A course mate of mine found my Twitter where even though I was using my name, I was using my photo and other identifiable things and I was very open about my sexuality. They told everyone in school, it was so awful. People started making very obscene jokes about me, people were very mean. It affected me and because I stopped going to classes often, it affected my grades for a long time. At some point, I just said fuck it and moved on with my life.
There was a boy I was talking to at some point but after a while, I lost interest. I had made the mistake of telling him I was bisexual before and when I told him I didn’t want to sleep with him, he went out of his way to tell everyone I was a lesbian. People were looking at me weird, some even came up to ask me. Luckily, I didn’t care about it all and kept telling them ‘yes’. Eventually, it became stale gossip.
When I was in my teens, I was very religious and when I started going through puberty and realizing I wasn’t straight. I made the mistake of turning to our music director in the choir. He and I were close and he tried to be very fatherly towards us. The moment I said it, he started looking at me differently and I immediately regretted saying anything. A few days later, my mum called me to her room and asked me why I wanted to disgrace her by being choosing homosexuality. I was destroyed. I never looked at him the same and left the choir and church as soon as I could.
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The post 4 Queer Nigerians Tell Us What It Is Like Being Outed Without Your Consent appeared first on Zikoko!.
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